...And Your Little Dog Too

There's only two reasons to pose in front of a map. The first is you are a Geography teacher. The second is your band is dorky. I think you can guess which one this is.

Last week Steve Lukather, guitarist and one of the founding members of the band Toto called it quits for the AOR giants. With that statement, I'm sure fans from Europe and Japan took pause but here in the United States it was met with resounding indifference. Most people in the US don't realize (or care) that Toto did anything past Toto IV. Actually, to most people Toto IV is the band's only record. So why is that? What do thousands of people from other cultures see in a band of fussy studio musicians playing their slick "yacht rock" with antiseptic precision that Americans cant? Why can they sell out Arenas in some countries but can barely cover a club tour here? To uncover this not so amazing mystery, I've made a list. And as my wife will tell you, I love lists. I have lists of my lists. In alphabetical order.

Reason #1: Studio musicians are not cool

The first reason is that a bunch of guys who look like they got lost on the way to Lab class are not cool, unless they really are cool and are posing that way to make an ironic point. Toto looked like a bunch of dudes who spent hours upon hours mastering their craft. Although I'm sure they all did drugs, dated actresses and what not, their image said "I read books about Macro Economics and Trigonometry". Outside of the after school library crowd, Toto was not cool.

Reason #2: Their music was generic

The main criticism leveled at the band is that their music was generic. As a fan, naturally I disagree, but part of what I liked about Toto was their professionalism. Until their last album, Falling In Between, Toto did not mix and match their genres. When they played soft rock, they played it perfectly, when they rocked out, it was well arranged to highlight the melody and solos, when they got their R&B groove on, it swung. There is a distinct Toto flava to the tunes, but in the end you knew their playing would be tight, clean and on the money. In American Rock N Roll, that's a crime.

Reason #3: They were inconsistent

That's actually my criticism in terms of their career, they were wildly inconsistent. It's ironic that a band known for a "bland" sound switched it up on every album. They've had a prog album, a stripped down Rock album, an Arena Rock album, a Soft Rock album and everything else too. Often these changes happened from one record to the next which caused a lot of churn in their audience, gain one set of fans and lose another.

Reason #4: No backing from their label except for Toto (first album) and Toto IV

Columbia often seemed confounded by what to do with Toto for reasons 1 thru 3. How do you sell a band that can't stick to one sound and gets no respect? The answer is, push the ballad and then stop. Wait for the contract to run out and in the meantime who knows, maybe they'll get lucky.

Reason #5: They lacked charisma

Well, yeah, they did. Toto was a band in the sense that they were all dependant on each other to make the sound happen, even though there were band leaders and David Paich wrote most of the songs there wasn't anyone who stood out from the rest of the group. They were equally talented musicians who performed as a unit. No Mick Jaggers or James Hetfields here.

And that was all she wrote for Toto here in the States. I'm just happy I got to see them perform live in 1999, that was a dream come true for me. Toto isn't the definitive band of anything, but I'll always enjoy their strong musicianship and great songs for years to come. Toto was awesome in their dogged commitment to "smooth music that rocks" and will be missed...by me anyway. To close, here's a few less famous but favorite tracks from the Grammy winning band. The last track, "Angel Don't Cry", is one of my all time favorite songs by anyone anywhere. Bye Bye Toto, it's been nice seeing ya!

Toto "Lea"

Toto "I'll Supply The Love"

Toto "Mad About You"

Toto "Angel Don't Cry"

Midnight Madness 5/18/08

Going One Step Beyond! It's Madness, pure madness.

I need a touch, I need a touch of Madness! The post that is, not the ska group. Though that song "Our House" was pretty good. I used to have the record though, the rest wasn't that good. Well, maybe if I liked ska more then it would be good. They were fun to watch live though. Ok, enough of this it's time to hit the list-

Don't Get Hysterical - but Def Leppard's new CD Songs From The Sparkle Lounge debuted in the Top 10 of the album chart on Billboard. While the band has made moves to increase their visibility in recent years this type of debut was totally unexpected. Totally Awesome.

They called him the Working Man - original Rush drummer John Rutsey passed away this week. Rutsey played drums on the trio's debut record including the classic "Working Man".

Get your Happy Feet out of here - The Producers of American Idol saddle Syesha Mercado with a ridiculous song choice to ensure a David vs David finale. It was probably going to happen anyway which made the manipulation all the worse. While AI will never own up to it, there's just no other reason to select a song about dancing penguins.


New Music Roundup - A lot of veteran bands are putting out new music which is making 2008 a great year for classic rock. Here's a little look at what's ahead:


Journey Revelations - the new album and the first to feature You Tube singer Arnel Pineda is to be sold exclusively through Wal Mart starting in June. The two tracks previewing at http://www.myspace.com/frontiersrecords is in the classic Journey style as promised with Pineda bringing new life to the band. Have the Arena Rockers found Steve Perry's ultimate replacement? The answer is coming soon.


Metallica Untitled - The Bay Area Metalheads are finishing up their new disc and touting long form songs this time out (maybe like ....And Justice For All) but the real question is: do they allow guitar solos this time? If these songs are ten minutes long, I sure hope so.


AC / DC Untitled - For a few years there have been rumors that AC/DC has been recording an album for a farewell tour. Well, at least the album part is confirmed for this year. It is said this is their experimental jazz album with guest appearances by Diana Krall and Steve Smith (Vital Information). Naw, I made that up-this should sound like every other AC/DC album. They're still the greatest live band I have ever seen. For Those About To Rock!


Dave Matthews Band Untitled - The DMB is saying there will be more shared songwriting among the band this time out. In any case, anticipate loosey goosey grooves with instrumental breaks and indecipherable singing - I mean that in a good way!


Motley Crue Saints of Los Angeles - Said to be based on their autobiography The Dirt, the Crue returns with the original foursome: Vince "new face" Neil, Tommy "I start fights with other people for press" Lee, Nikki "I'm not dead" Sixx and Mick Mars who has been through too much to slag (I actually consider Mars one of the most underrated guitarists of the 80's). The first track is a good one and if Def Lep can get a Top 10 record then so can these guys.


Queen Untitled - Roger Taylor and Brian May have hit the studio with Paul Rodgers which will be interesting in itself, I can't recall hearing Rodger's voice being multitracked a hundred times over. This combo of musicians is kind of exciting, then I remember The Firm with Jimmy Page and think a wait and see attitude may be best.


Boston Untitled - Will be working more on the new album following a tour with new lead singer Michael Sweet (ex-Stryper). Is rumored to feature re-recordings of some songs from the Corporate America album. This is not going to help the general belief that Boston remakes the same album each time. I know Tom Scholz believes in recycling and may shave a few years off the recording time but reeks of either ego or laziness.


Los Lonely Boys Forgiven - The sophomore jinx hit the Boys hard last time out, hopefully they can get back on track and recapture a bit of "Heaven". I still like that first album.

Coldplay Vida La Viva - A darker sound permeates the lead single "Violet Hill" but still has the glowing keyboards and swoony vocals they're known for.


Pearl Jam Untitled - The grungemeisters are set to follow up their self titled 2006 disc with producer Brendan O'Brien who was at the helm of their Vs. (1993) album. I look forward to every PJ release and with O'Brien back they could really rock.


Foreigner No End In Sight - The long running Arena Rockers return with yet another greatest hits set (is this like ten of them now? I lost count) and will feature a new song with vocalist Kelly Hanson, the first recording with him at the mic.


And now I'll leave off with some Madness-

Madness "Our House"

Progger's Deliight

No, it's not an Elf searching for the One Ring...it's Steve Howe! Maestro tours with Yes and Asia this summer to make sure everyone feels the heat of the moment in the roundabout. Late 70's blue Swedish jumpsuit not included.

I said a British/Rock Stars/Who Play Really Long Songs/That Don't Stop-oops, wrong genre. That was the beat to the first rap song I ever heard, "Rapper's Delight", what I mean to write about is that this is shaping up to be a Progressive Rock Summer. Progressive Rock, or Prog, is one of my favorite sub genres of Rock. It's a form that was popular mostly in the early 70's, where mainly British musicians were inspired by The Beatle's Sgt Pepper album to throw as much Classical music into their rock as they could. Lyrics usually were hippy-dippy about abstract, futuristic themes while the songs would be up to 30 minutes long with huge solos of every instrument imaginable. What makes this the Summer of Prog? I'm so glad you didn't ask, but I'm going to tell you anyway:

Yes

Dormant for about five years, the definitive Prog rock band returns for their 40th anniversary. One of my favorite bands of all time, 4/5ths of what's called the "Classic Yes" lineup hits the road. Jon Anderson (vocals), Steve Howe (guitars), Chris Squire (bass) and Alan White (drums) are joined by keyboardist Rick Wakeman's son, Oliver Wakeman. So bust out your Lord of the Rings and Dungeons and Dragons gear, 'cause Yes is coming back to fill your head with magic forests, hobbits and 12 sided dice one 20 minute organ solo at a time. Get Close to the Edge for this one! (I've seen Yes about 8 times and have not heard "Close to the Edge" live yet. If I go, maybe this will be the year.)

Asia

Really excited about seeing this band, Steve Howe does double duty this summer joining the original lineup of John Wetton (bass), Geoff Downes (keyboards) and Carl Palmer (drums) for a new album and tour. The new album, Phoenix, has an early buzz of being frozen in time sounding like it was made twenty years ago. In other words, it could be one of the greatest albums ever made!

Dream Theater

The long running American Prog Metal band continues their unique path by touring behind the new two disc compilation Their Greatest Hit (...and 21 other pretty cool songs). As with all things DT, the timing gets a little off as they just released a second video for an album that came out last year-a song that's not included in their compilation. Why spend money to promote the previous album? I have no clue, but as with many things DT related I don't question it I just enjoy it.

The video, "Forsaken" was for one of the best songs from the Systematic Chaos album of 2007. A Metal ballad with Exorcist style piano (Mike Oldfield would be proud), the video is reminiscent of the old Heavy Metal mag and movie. Fully animated and not covering for horrendous self abuse like the Britney Spears video, the song seems to involve flying vampires, bright explosions of magical powers and drug metaphors. All it needs is a Barbarella type woman brandishing a broadsword and riding a dragon to be complete.

Dream Theater "Forsaken"

Music Roundup-RIP Kevin DuBrow

A lot has happened in music lately, the biggest news being the death of Kevin DuBrow-

Kevin Dubrow of Quiet Riot found dead

Lead singer of Quiet Riot Kevin DuBrow was found dead in his home a few days ago. He was only 52 years old. Like many teenagers in the early 80's, I bought Quiet Riot's Metal Health album based on their big hit "Cum On Feel The Noize". Though they didn't receive full credit, that remake of a classic Slade song was the "Smells Like Teen Spirit" of that decade ushering in a wave of hair metal on MTV. Other songs like "Bang Your Head" and "Slick Black Cadillac" also stood out. Quiet Riot was sort of the doorway band to Metal for me, the first Heavy Metal band I had ever listened to. I also liked the fact that it was a multicultural band as half of the lineup was Hispanic.

Despite having a very successful album and a recognizable mascot, Quiet Riot quickly faded out. They would occassionally show up as a minor blip on the rock radar with their followup Slade remake "Mama Weer All Crazee Now" or the stomping "The Wild and the Young" but could never recapture their initial heat. Which is too bad, because they were a good band.

DuBrow had an outsized persona of a rock and roll crazy man that didn't translate well once the Hair Metal bands got pretty and sang power ballads. While I can't claim to be a die hard Quiet Riot fan, I liked the band and think it's sad that he's gone.

Rosanna Arquette seen with Paul McCartney

Normally I don't think much of McCartney's love life but being seen with Rosanna Arquette is news. She is the muse that has inspired some great songs (Toto's "Rosanna" and a lot of Peter Gabriel's songs). For some reason she's more inspiring as a musician's girlfriend than as a actress. Go figure.

Saga auditioning new singers on You Tube

The Canadian progressive rock band Saga is auditioning for new singers through their website at http://sagaontour.moonfruit.com/theband/4519368536 . You can download an instrumental track to two of their biggest hits, "On The Loose" and "Wind Him Up", and then record yourself singing to it and upload it to You Tube. Then you can e-mail them your You Tube link. Pretty cool, if I could sing I would try out myself.

Asia announces intention to record a new album

Finally, after many decades the original Asia will be recording a new album. With the current feeling of good will among the band and an emphasis on the debut album when playing live, hopefully the new disc will have more of the instrumental interplay they had at the beginning. Meanwhile, the John Payne version of Asia appears to be continuing as well which could result in one of those Survivor style battles (is Survivor Jimi Jamison or Frankie Sullivan?).

Led Zeppelin tour rumor

Could it be? This would be a blessing and a curse if it happens, it would be yet another high priced reunion tour. But it's Led Zeppelin!

Van Halen plays tonight in Sacramento

Finally gonna see them live with DLR. And unlike when I saw Rush, I plan on not drinking at all so I can remember what I'm seeing and hearing. Yes!

To close this out, I'm going to include a link to "Mama Weer All Crazee Now"

Quiet Riot - "Mama Weer All Crazee Now"

My friends...the great experiment

Give it away, give it away now-wait, that's that other 90's band

Radiohead is trying out a revolutionary idea in selling their music by making their new album In Rainbows available for download months before it's official release date. On October 10th, anyone can download the album from http://www.inrainbows.com/Store/Quickindex.html and pay whatever price they want to pay for it. Meaning I could buy it for a dollar if I wanted to. Will it work? I think the entire music industry will be watching.

If it works well, the music industry will probably demonize it as the worst thing to happen since Napster because it means any successful artist could branch out on their own without a record company. Or worse, become their own record company by signing and promoting other artists. It's another step towards a decentralized music business that won't be as restrictive.

My opinion? Well, I think that site is going to crash when Radiohead's millions of fans hit the site on the 10th. I might be wrong (minor Radiohead joke) but the site is going to go from medium use to extremely heavy use in a day. Financially, I think it will sell about the same as it would on ITunes or any other digital outlet because the dollar a song and Wal Mart's $10.00 pricing is ingrained in us at this point.

Radiohead currently doesn't have a record deal so they will get to keep the money either way. I bet the fans will wear the price they paid as a badge of honor when they go to the concert, "Yeah, I spent like $50.00 for In Rainbows." In any case, this is a bold move that only an established band can make and they deserve some respect for trying it out.

Britney Spears - Game Over?

Gimmie More vodka, gin & tonic, 7&7 and anything else you got

Last night, Britney Spears made her extremely hyped "comeback" at the VMAs in Las Vegas. At this point, I think anyone who has access to any entertainment news outlet knows it was a disaster. Spears seemed to sleepwalk through her performance, barely bothering to lip synch or even move around the stage. Her army of background dancers twirled their little hearts out to pick up the noticeable slack in Spear's performance. Best of all, noted music stars like Puff Daddy / Diddy / Whatever looked noticeably shocked as if they had witnessed a horrific accident. In short, it was the funniest four minutes I had seen on TV in months. Even Justin Timberlake's "D*ck in a Box" wasn't quite as funny.

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In a way the Vegas setting was suitable in that Spears reminded me a lot of Elvis. The later years Elvis, the one who looked jumbled and disconnected because of drugs and rambled through performances while throwing randomly bizarre Karate moves. Spears had the same look in her eyes: numb and lost.

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But, unlike some of the media I don't think Spear's career is over. At least not yet. The key will be if Spears can get into physical shape in both physique and performance. I'm not saying Spears is overweight or unattractive, it's that when you get down to it what Spear's sold was an exaggerated perception of sex. At her peak, Spears was the ultimate tease that men wanted to see and a large section of preteen girls wanted to be. It wasn't her nondescript voice, mediocre song choices, personal interpretation of music or even her personality. Britney was successful because she (or more likely her handlers) knew how to sensationalize her sexuality, whether it was being jailbait, showing skin in tight outfits or kissing Madonna. Without that perfectly toned body doing outlandishly sharp choreography, there's nothing of interest to see.

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Spears can make a comeback if she leaves long enough for people to forget her and uses the time to build back what made her a star (for career strategy see Carey, Mariah). Some would say it is unfair to ask Britney Spears to meet an impossible measure of physical perfection but the problem is she built her career on it. If she wants a comeback, she'll have to do it again. Despite the epic disaster that is her life, the door is still open to her. She just has to walk through.

Musical Musings

It's been a wild week in entertainment and it's only Monday! Hulk Hogan's son Nick proved he's as reckless a driver off the racing track as on, fortunately he and his passenger hasn't died. Hopefully both will come out OK. Owen Wilson (I think he's called the Butterscotch Stallion) allegedly tried to commit suicide. That's not funny, it's just...sad. Lindsey Lohan gets a day in jail for walking into a police station with cocaine in her possession. You know you're a hot girl when you can get away with a slap on the wrists for drug possession. Paris Hilton was sent to jail longer for traffic violations! I bet Paris is burning...with jealousy, that is.

But most troubling on the entertainment front is John Wetton's heart surgery. Who, you ask. Well, Wetton was the main songwriter / lead singer / bassist of Asia. The continent you say? No, the British early 80's supergroup that released two proper albums before personnel shifts and changing music trends sent them into obscurity. Wetton was a key member of Asia which also included drummer Carl Palmer, keyboardist Geoff Downes and guitarist Steve Howe. Their first two albums, Asia (1982) and Alpha (1983) were important to my early adolecence. My first attempt at singing (horribly) was recording myself singing "The Smile Has Left Your Eyes" because Wetton had a low, droning voice that I thought matched mine (wasn't even close, I can't sing). I had an Asia poster on my wall and was depressed when Wetton was ousted from the band just before the infamous Asia in Asia concert on MTV. I remember buying their third album Astra (1985) and having my friend ask me if I was listening to Barry Manalow. Asia, John Wetton's Asia, was the model of everything dorky, excessive and uncool in the early 80's. Needless to say, they were my heroes.

So, here's to hoping everyone out there having a rough time has things get better soon. Especially John Wetton, the Heat Goes On buddy!

Other quick hits on the music front:

Kelly Clarkson's My December has only gone Gold and is considered a failure. Like many commercial artists, she thought making an artistic statement was playing the same type of songs with all the catchy parts taken out. Unless your name is Phil Collins, it's painful to watch commercial artists try to un-sell out.

Rilo Kiley is being blasted all over the net for ditching their cute indie sound for a commerical modern rock sound. It's painful to watch indie darlings sell out. And their new song "Silver Lining" rips off the guitar lick from George Harrison's "My Sweet Lord". Still, I have a soft spot for this band, so it's not over yet.

The Foo Fighter's new song "The Pretender"rocks hard but borrows it's chorus from Sesame Street's "One of these things is not like the other" tune. We'll have to wait to see if the new album is sponsored by the letter A.